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Category Archives: Counseling & Coaching

Finding Your Destiny: Listening to your Mind, Body, and Soul

Counseling & Coaching, Motivational, Uncategorized0 comments

Artem Kniaz of UnSplash

In the world of counseling, I have the wonderful privilege to walk with people grappling with issues of life.  One of the gratifying aspects of the profession is when the issue turns to one of calling.  Even if you’re not actively contemplating this issue of authenticity, if you remain still long enough, your body, mind, and heart will tell you if you’re on the path towards integrity or one wracked with insincerity to self.

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The Incel Problem: Blaming and Externalizing the Problem

Counseling & Coaching, Man Up!3 comments

Andrew Neel from Unsplash

The tragic death of 10 innocent lives in Toronto is a reminder of the vitriol and hate stemming from a minority viewpoint from within a fringe group known as “involuntary celibates” or Incels for short.

25 year old Alek Minassian intentionally struck a number of people on a busy Toronto street with a rental van and was charged today with 10 counts of murder and 13 counts of attempted murder.

Police say on the suspect’s social media accounts, messages read: “The Incel Rebellion has already begun! We will overthrow all the Chads and Stacys! All hail the Supreme Gentleman Elliot Rodger!” Continue Reading

The Masks We Wear: The Public and Private Faces

Counseling & Coaching0 comments

In everyday life, we all wear masks.  It’s part of the reality of living that we have different “masks” or personas we project to the public.

But what’s important is having some conscious awareness of what we’re doing and being able to see if the masks we wear interfere with healthy living. Continue Reading

Involuntary Celibacy: The “Incel” Revolution

Counseling & Coaching, Dating2 comments

Matthew Henry/Unsplash

Young men who struggle with finding romantic partners are finding solace in their shared experience with each other.  They even have coined a term, “Incel” to describe their situation as being involuntary celibate.

From Reddit to other online message boards, there is much sexual frustration and angst among this group.  The Centers for Disease Control calculates 27.2% of men and 28.6% of women are sexless in the 15-24 age bracket.  Despite this being in equal numbers, it is men who express the dissatisfaction, possibly due to skewed Western societal views that equate sex with masculinity. Continue Reading

Real Men Cry: Crying is Caring

Addictions, Asian Shame, Counseling & Coaching0 comments

cryingWhen my male clients initially come in to see me they often share painful aspects of their childhood yet look like disembodied souls as there’s so much incongruity between their stories and their affect.

When I confront them on this, they shrug their shoulders saying that’s just how they were raised. It’s heart-wrenching to see so many men tell me they feel weak, shameful, and inadequate for having feelings of sadness, pain, and disappointment. All their lives they were told, “Real men don’t cry,” yet studies show how crying is a way for the body to release toxins from the body. Continue Reading

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