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The Purpose of Pornography: Porn also traps those who lack purpose in their lives.

Uncategorized0 comments

Photo by Patrick Fore on Unsplash

In my work with those dealing with addictions in general but more specifically those dealing with pornography use, there’s an overwhelming sense of purposelessness. They may have a great image such as nice homes, professions, and even families but their internal core is askew. They feel spiritually empty and devoid of substance and may resign themselves to using porn/sex as a way to ease the pain that gnaws at the soul.

As humans, we need a deep sense of meaning or calling. Making money for men has often been a mirage. Men may think if they have the right job or make a certain amount of money they have found “it”. But no amount of material wealth or goods can give us what we desperately need- a divine calling that lights our path to our own healing and wholeness.

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Where are all the White Actors?: My own racism against a multicultural cast.

Race Matters: Candid Conversations on Race & Culture, Uncategorized0 comments

I was watching an episode of Black Mirror on Netflix recently and couldn’t pinpoint why I was internally upset. It had nothing to do with the storylines or acting as both were great but had everything to do with seemed like too many ethnic actors.

It sounds hypocritical coming from me as an Asian-American therapist who focuses on cultural issues where I am such an adamant proponent of having more ethnic diversity in entertainment. But the reality is even I have been conditioned to resist it in reality.

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How to Hijack Black Lives Matter: Why people divert attention to, “All lives Matter” or “Blue Lives Matter”.

Race Matters: Candid Conversations on Race & Culture, Uncategorized0 comments

Photo by Mike Von on UnSplash

It’s so hard for some Americans to understand the slogan, mantra, and heart behind, “Black Lives Matter” (BLM for short).  Three words that somehow infuriate certain white Americans and get them defensive, angry, and responding in a manner that detracts, dismiss, and diverts attention to the initial cause behind BLM.

For example, earlier this week, the NBA’s Sacramento Kings’ sportscaster, Grant Napear (who’s white) was in a Twitter exchange with former Kings center DeMarcus Cousins (who’s African-American).   Cousins asked Napear for his thoughts on the Black Lives Matter movement and Napear responded with, “All Lives Matter…Every Single One!”

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Black Lives Matter: An Asian perspective of how America can heal from Racism.

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As an Asian-American immigrant who’s family of 3 generations moved to a racially-mixed neighborhood of South Seattle in the 1970s, we understand racism from a lived experience.  Not only have we’ve been victims of stereotypes and racist acts against Asians, but we’ve seen our African-American neighbors and friends suffer from the consequences of systemic racism.

We’ve watched Black friends in grade school have guns drawn on them by police in our own back yard, ostensibly because someone called the cops concerned about trespassing.  

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Counseling amidst the Coronavirus: While video sessions are good, nothing can replace face-to-face sessions.

Counseling & Coaching, Uncategorized0 comments

Image by Grief Recovery Center from Pixabay

After nearly two months of being locked down and tucked away in my home office, I finally saw my first client in-person this week.  While some clients are more cautious and have no issues with teletherapy, others have been asking if they could see me in-person.

So with a few safety adjustments to my office (mainly ensuring 6 feet of distance between us, requiring hand-washing of clients, etc.), I re-opened with little fanfare.  But what was noticeable was how alive, energized, and rejuvenated I felt compared to the endless Zoom sessions I’ve been accustomed to that left me emotionally and physically drained, depleted, and exhausted.

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