Euphoric Recall: An Undeniable Part of Recovery
Many of my clients who struggle with problematic sexual behaviors will report during their recovery of having what’s known as “euphoric recall”. These are sexual memories, images, or past experiences that come flooding to the forefront when they are sometimes sleeping, driving, working, or having sex with their current partners.
It can feel distressing but I try and assure them that after years of sexually acting out, this is a natural byproduct of the body’s attempt to flush itself clean. Nevertheless, it can provoke even more shame and humiliation that they are going backwards in their recovery when in fact it’s a part of the healing process.
Many partners struggle with this fact and consequently are confused. This is often not mentioned or neglected among therapists but needs to be mentioned early on so partners of addicts are not confused as to the trajectory of the therapeutic process.
Some may argue that having a sexual thought (other than one’s partner) shouldn’t happen and needs to be thoroughly evaluated. I agree only if it becomes a pattern after the early phases of treatment (initial 6 months). Depending on the client, if I recognize there is a pattern of euphoric recall after this time, then we have to wonder about the person’s sobriety and the cues he/she may be picking up within the environment that may be contributing to the recall.
Oftentimes, clients are unaware of how social media, internet, movies, advertising, and news stories are laden with sexual stories and content. What’s often recommended among therapists is a celibacy period of both sex (i.e. masturbation included) and media infiltration to allow the body to reset itself to a more natural and less hyper-sexualized state.
Once this is achieved, the client is better able to recognize his/her sexual triggers and eventually lower the frequency of the euphoric recall. Notice I mentioned lower, because people are human and the recall may still happen from time to time but at a much lower and less troubling rate.
